We’ve all been there – we meet someone who we’re really into and ask them out on a date. You want to get to know her more, but she never seems to have time. What should you do in this situation? How should you respond to her?
How to respond when a girl says she is busy? The best way to respond to a girl who says she is busy is to relax and not express any disappointment. If she says she is busy now but is willing to find the time when both of you are free, it could just mean she really is busy. She may like you, or she is at least willing to get to know you more.
Many times, however, a girl will say she is busy if she wants to let you down gently – think of it as her saying no in a polite way.
If the girl you’re interested in is always busy regardless of when you ask her out, you should just move on and accept it. If she’s not into you, there’s really not a lot of things you can do.
Read on to learn more about how to respond when a girl says she is busy, as well as what it means and how to win her over.
What It Really Means When a Girl Says She Is Busy
Maybe you’re just asking someone out for a date for the first time, or maybe you already went out on a date that you think went well. But when you text her the following day and ask her out again, she says she’s busy. What does this mean?
1. She Is Simply Not into You
If she likes you, she’ll make time for you – as simple as that. Put yourself in her shoes. If you liked someone, would you tell that person you were too busy and didn’t have time to spend with them?
Let’s say she really was busy, but if she were interested in you, she’d let you know when she’d be available so you could hang out then. But if her reply is simply that she’s busy, it’s a sign that she’s just not into you.
If you already went out on a date, and then you text her the next day to ask her out again, and you get a reply that she’s busy, it’s possible that she did not feel any connection with you. Or maybe she was not physically attracted, or maybe you said or did something that turned her off. Either way, you’ll probably never find out, so you shouldn’t overthink and worry about it.
2. She Found Someone Else
One of the reasons why a girl may say she’s busy is because she has found someone else. She may have been asked out by someone else, or she may have found someone else whom she likes more than you. If this is the case, you shouldn’t take it personally. This other person is better than you – at least in her own opinion!
Most girls go out on dates with different men if they’re not in a steady relationship, and through one of these dates, she may have found someone whom she finds more interesting than you.
Men should also see other girls and find the one with whom they have the best connection. There’s no reason to see just one person unless you’re in a relationship with them. If you’re not, go see other people! The point of dating is to find the best match for you, so you should see other girls.
3. She Is Truly Busy
A girl may say that she is busy because she truly is busy. Just because you went out on a date doesn’t mean she has to explain everything she does in her life to you. She may be busy because of family matters, or she got promoted at work, and the new position is leaving her overwhelmed with the responsibilities. Maybe she’s still adjusting and simply does not have time to go out on a date.
At this point, you should give her time to settle down and get her life organized. When she has the time for you in the future, and if she wants to spend it with you, she will make time for you.
Just make sure you don’t bombard her with voicemail and texts with hateful messages demanding time. And don’t send any message showing how angry or frustrated you are with her refusal to spend time with you. It’s never good to show needy behavior as this will definitely turn her off and kill your chances with her. You’re just still dating and not in a relationship, so keep your emotions in check.
For how to respond when a guy says he is busy, see the article: What to Say When a Guy Says He’s Too Busy?
How to Respond When a Girl Says She Is Busy
Next, I’ll list situations where a girl might say she’s busy and how to respond or react in those situations.
You ask her out for a drink, but she says she is busy and has other plans.
If she responds in this way, avoid assuming the worst and think about what exactly happened in this situation. This could have happened in at least two ways: the first one being you asked her out for a drink, and she says she is busy right then and there.
The second possibility is when you ask her out for a drink, and she says yes. But before your date, she cancels because she says she is busy and has other plans.
If the girl says she is busy right then and there the moment you ask her out, it is very likely that she’s not interested in going out with you. However, it is also possible that she just has other plans and she’s busy. Her body movements and facial expressions would give you more clues. If she doesn’t tell you when she’s available, just accept the fact she’s not into you and move on.
If the girl says yes, but cancels later, it could just mean that something came up, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up thinking about it. On the other hand, it could also mean she just didn’t want to say no upfront to let you down gently. It’s also possible that she thought at first you were just going to hang out as friends, but then realized that it was a date, so she said no.
You ask her to hang out, but she says she’s busy and is just not interested.
You ask a girl to hang out, but then she replies that she is busy and/or she is not interested. This could mean several things: first, is she is really busy. Second, she sees you as a friend. It’s also possible that she wants to let you down gently.
It’s possible that the girl you asked out is really just busy and doesn’t have time to go out with you right now. You’ll know this is true when she tells you when she’s available and makes time for you. Now, if the girl seems to be busy forever, just move on.
The girl may say she’s busy or she’s not interested if she only sees you as a friend. She hopes not to hurt your feelings since she considers you as a friend but doesn’t see you becoming someone beyond that. What happens is she will tell you she’s busy just to let you down gently.
You ask her to hang out, but she says she’s busy at the moment.
Hooray! This is actually a good sign! What this means is that she is busy right now but is willing to make time for you later. It could be that she’s busy with work, or she’s sorting something out with her personal life, and she just doesn’t have any time to spare right now.
It’s also possible that she’s in the process of a breakup or just got out of a relationship and is taking a break from seeing people. In any case, you will get to spend time together.
How to Win the Busy Girl Over
There are those moments in time when you have to stop chasing someone and start working on yourself. After all, you want the girl of your dreams to like you back, right? You should make yourself desirable as well so that the girl will see how smart, funny and charming you really are. You want to attract the girl even beyond your first date.
1. Don’t Try Too Hard
Just be yourself! Girls like it when the man is true to himself and isn’t afraid to show who he really is.
2. Make the First Move
Another thing: most girls, if not all, like it when a man makes the first move. A certain level of assertiveness is ideal, but do take note of #3.
3. Don’t Be Too Assertive
If there’s one thing you shouldn’t overdo, it’s being too assertive. You don’t want her to think you’re a jerk; you just want her to see you as someone who goes after what he wants – to see you as confident.
4. Give Her Some Space
In relation to not being too assertive, you should also give her space. Avoid bombarding her with text messages or calls every five minutes. She has her own life and should be allowed to live it.
5. Make Your Time Together Awesome
You should let the girl have an awesome time with you. Try to find out what she likes and what she’s interested in. Make sure she has such a good time with you that she will look forward to seeing you again.
6. Get Creative
When you spend time together, it doesn’t automatically mean you have to spend tons of money just to make your time together fun. You don’t always have to go out on expensive dates; get creative and put some thought into your time together. She’ll appreciate your efforts for sure!
7. Really Listen to What She Says
Some people listen in order to reply, but sometimes all a girl wants is someone who will really listen to what they’re saying. It may not always make sense. Sometimes, a girl can say silly things, especially when she’s nervous, but if you really want to impress her, really listen to what she says. Sometimes it’s better just to be there rather than be right.
8. Don’t Downplay Yourself
She may be your dream girl, but if you want to get a shot at a second date, you should show her that together, you make a great match. You should show her that you are equals and that you also have qualities that she may find attractive as well. You both have to be attracted to each other in order for it to work.
9. Show Her What Interests You
Don’t be afraid to show her what you’re interested in. It’s actually a lot better to find out early on that you’re not compatible than discovering it after you’ve already invested a significant amount of time together. It’s ok if you don’t like the same things, but if you’re really into each other, these things could be new adventures for both of you.
10. Have Plans of Your Own
Your world does not and should not revolve around the girl you’re interested in. She will find it attractive that you have plans of your own and that you’re not always available.
Conclusion: How to Respond When a Girl Says She Is Busy?
Is there a girl you want to get to know more, but she’s always busy when you ask her out? This has happened to nearly everyone, so don’t sweat it.
How to respond when a girl says she is busy? The best way to respond at first is to keep your cool and don’t show you are upset or disappointed. If she says she is busy now but is willing to find the time when both of you are free, it could just mean she really is busy. She may like you, or she is at least willing to get to know you more.
If the girl you’re interested in is always telling you she is busy, regardless of when you ask her out, it is best to move on and accept her decision. There’s not much you can do. There are so many fish in the sea who are just as perfect and will love to spend time with you.